sunflower seeds

How many bags of sunflower seeds has my fingers ripped open? More bags than I can count. One thing that all my men have always held against me is my love for seeds. I love to read and seed. I try not to spill the shells, I really do. Shit I cannot write or think or do any damn thing except get lost in my love for you. Where are you and whose arms are you wrapped up tight in ? I don't want anyone else to kiss or promise me the things that you use to promise me. I am sorry ...I am sorry
Do you ever think bout me or miss the life we had ? I was talkin with one of your friends and they said you were having a hard time without me. I started to cry cause I cannot come back home. It will be the death of me. I thought I could change you with my love. That if you had my love you would be able to live without the drugs you poison yourself with. But that is not so, you had an arm to wrap around each of us. I do not believe you when you say you quit..that is like you stating that you figured out how to live without oxygen. I cannot watch you drown yourself in a drugs embrace without wanting to slap you hard across the face and scream BREATHE BREATHE BREATHE.