sister maria

Myself and Kristy were in the back of the church putting up cleaning supplies. There was a meeting going on and we were actually waiting for our director to show up so we could all climb in the women's home van and get our tired aching bodies in bed. 5am comes early. I remember looking at Kristy and it got very quiet as i quickly looked away. She asked me.."Kris are you okay?"  I nodded annoyed that she caught the look on my face and felt she had to ask if i was alright. She and I locked eyes and i looked away first and for some reason i looked at the track mark on my home. i exhaled slowly as my little finger rested on it for a brief second. I don't know what really happened next only that i was not in control of my actions. My fingernails dug into my flesh and scratched deep into my skin, drawing blood instantly. I fell to the floor with my arms straight out from my body. As my arms were being mutilated by my own fingers. I was in a frenzy. I could not stop what was happening to me. I was silent the whole time. Poor Kristy. She ran over to me and started to pray over me. For a second my mind cleared and i heard my mind scream out to me... ARE YOU FRIGGING STUPID KRIS ? I started to cry and beg her not to tell pastor or anyone else for that matter. I started to have the exact same scratching fit the second she stopped praying over me. I wasn't terrified I was almost pleased with the pain i had inflicted on myself. It burned like fire. Suddenly pastor was in front of me asking me if i was okay i said yes. But when he noticed my arms he called out the others who are strong in the lord. I was shaking in fright and shame. I was soo ashamed to know they were all witness to such an act and in a church that we all went to. I started to choke on my phlegm I was crying that hard .Suddenly there were hands all over me.  i wanted to be free. i wanted peace. i wanted to be whole. Pastor's wife Sister Maria started making funny noises and coughing real funny. They bent me over at the waist and started yelling at me to spit it out. spit out what? Sister Maria broke away from me and ran down the hall and threw up in front of the door they had all came out of. I sank to the floor knowing something had happened. I will always be in awe of pastor and sister maria. I know this sounds strange but i know in my heart that because of her something evil left me and went into her and that it had no hold in her because of the light of god inside her.