the man

Last night i lay in the darkness as my soul began  to scream out into the nether world for grace and healing that i have not earned. my screams shattered the barren place that resides between both our worlds. tears poured out of both my eyes as i tried to sit up and beg for the room to breathe. Just as quickly as it had started i fell back on my pillow and drifted off to sleep. I was walking along a worn dirt path that wound and turned out of view. Instead of feeding the worry that was growing at the back of my mind I began to concentrate on the small whisper of wind that was caressing my face, like the fingers of a mother trying to calm a child. I felt the trees ache to protect me and a silence took hold of my hand.the silence soo thick with meaning that i stopped to look around. There was an old man sitting in a wicker swing that hung between two trees. i cleared my throat and began to panic at what was going on. My fingers began to wring each other and without moving forward to face this man i fell on my knees. i could sense time move thru the top of the trees and i lay in the shelter of their arms. A pulse began to pump into the atmosphere like the heartbeat inside my chest. i was at a loss for words and really was thankful for this unintended rest. i had no voice or reason to speak to this man who sat alone. but why was he here in this place so far from the world? i sat up and looked around and i felt he was trying to communicate with what is inside of me. i stood up behind him and put my hands on his swing and i heard what i thought was the wind if it had been given voice. he asked me what i could give to him and i hung my head and sobbed. i have nothing. no real life at all or loved ones who even keep in touch with me. i cried and wiped my nose on my sleeve and stumbled  back to the ground. there is nothing deep inside of me i gave it all to my vice. i was soo ashamed of who i am that i took a step back and another. I was almost to the point of running back the way i had come when he stood and turned around. His face was unfocused and moving like a spaceship to another world. i was consumed with peace and longing to find out where he was from. he took both my hands and he looked into my eyes and he began to lift off the ground and disappear into the clouds and i am left there with the songs of birds as i look around.