Tuesday, May 15, 2012

gimme back my bullets..



moving thru all the debris that life has left in our path is simple folks..don't stop.slow down if you have to but stay the course. when things get dark and cold get up and move around or build a fire) if that is not the answer you are looking for then red hot anger is a good substitute. the only thing about the anger/rage thing is you have to keep feeding it. that will be a downfall if you are not careful. when you are not looking or paying attention your focus will change to supporting it. every single thing we see are hear or touch is not what it appears. we draw what we want from our enviroment or worse what we think we deserve. life is fatal...to the death from the first breath. are we still and time moves thru us or are we the ones moving in time? think how many different realities we are a part of..driving  down the highways and byways of life.   there are so many moments to choose from and you don't even realize it. yes keep your eyes on the road but remember the beauty that is all around us. don't give up completely and don't expect someone to come and save you from yourself. it is a possibility that there will be more than a single hand holding out their arm to help you up. but know this-it is better to have no one but yourself to witness how it is you got there in the first place. it can haunt you later knowing that someone u hold dear saw you in a bad place. i know these are just words ..but if you are really gonna hit bottom you must never cry wolf.
 howl if you need to and be crazy about if you have to, even grudge sex to reward yourself for not going there with whoever wants to help you up.flesh is flesh  you don't owe anybody anything. no excuses is easy-simply stick with the no lies policy. less complications if you pick yourself up and brush your ass off before anyone notices. you never get a second chance to make a first impression. i don't like to talk about my past it makes me feel anxious and self destructive if i know that an ex friend or lover has the juice on me. i don't worry about having to explain myself to people who don't even know me.   another thing that has done wonders as far as my attitude is making every possible effort to think positive inside my head. i don't talk shit inside my head while my face is having a total different talk. i mean you can be talking to your friend and she is asking you if she looks okay and you tell her yeah she looks good to her face but in your head this sarcastic cackle erupts into laughter and your mind thinks..yeah you look good with your fat roll and fat ass stuffed into those tight pants. you shut that inner voice down. you do it and you start thinking positive things and notice how pretty the song is that the birds are singing. you do it because when you are in the process of falling or already there and you think the world is against you it is where you will turn to for comfort and answers. you must not listen it is feeding your fears with doubt and insecurity to feed the fire of unrighteousness  that is burning inside of you. who is to say-my pain and suffering is greater than yours? don't waste your time chasing that wascaly rabbit.let that one get away!

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