apps. .

 

today was perfect i think hehe. mom and i both went upto the mall about 10am to turn in job applications. i turned in four and she turned in one at hallmark cards. looking back i think working at the casino was probably the most fun. driving the shuttle back and forth from the parking lot to the family entrance. one thing i can say from that whole experience is never never date your boss ! speaking of boys it is like i have been soo long without one that i am kinda getting use to it. there is nobody new in the picture no matter how far i expand the view. wow gonna be 46 in less than two weeks. everytime any guy smiles at me mom will catch it and wait til we are driving home and ask me ..did that guy know you ? i always say mmhh. she persists that guy that couldn't stop smiling at you or the gentleman that let us cut in line ? mom mom mom i know none of these men don't worry i am not going to leave you empty handed and alone with christmas just around the corner. besides who will wrap all the presents ? i have treatment in less than an hour. . probably not the best picture to post and mention treatment. oh no someone will figure out my past vice. tonight when i speak i know the holy ghost is going to annoint my words and open the minds of my brothers who sit before me. it is where i am from that gives me the right to explain where we are all headed. been there done that. they seem soo young and not hardcore from the world i know. i can only thank god they never got that desperate. because the things that i have seen like a father shoot up his daughter in the neck with heroine when she is 18 years old so she would not leave home have left a scar on my heart. it feels soo good to walk up the six steps and open the door to the chapel. today was windy and blustery and as i kneeled to pray the sunlight was dancing among the stain glass windows making it appear there were angels dancing around the sanctuary. when i walked out with tears drying on my face i always say . . bye to  mary  the figure standing outside and my eyes focused on an open garage across the street. yuck there was a deer being gutted as it hung upside down and two men with knifes laying meat out on a table barf