sniffles..

am way past the sniffles now..dove headfirst into the arms of this cold about 10 hours ago.it actually hurts when i breath, no it burns actually and you know what else that ails me is all the little "perks" that insist on participating in this malady of mine has grown considerably larger like the aches and pains have moved inside my body with all their suitcases full of ingredients like phlegm and runny nose and the loss of my voice etc. i tweaked my lower back coughing last night and well when i lay down it is like my back starts to fuck with me and my mom is telling me you need to spit that out kris ..i know i know. i smile cause i am miserable grouchy but i am fine because i have changed my socks people and once you change your socks it is like you have just entered a new kingdom he he alright-time to go to bed. my poor neighbor yesterday offered me twenty dollars to rake his leaves cause people with multiple college educations tend to do that don't they to try to help you out when all they are really doing is helping themself out of the work they could pay somebody else to do. you know i change my mind that is not a dumb thing that is a damn good thing. anyway he swore maybe one bag of leafs so even though i just had walked home from work and hadn't even made it inside my front door and you know what ? i grabbed the rake without putting on a coat and he turned into hitler. i was upto four bags and the yard waste can full when i almost walked off the job because he just kept expecting more. i was fine one second and when i noticed a blister on the finger from that damn rake i changed into evil bitch- just like that. he brought a band aid out and actually asked me if i was sure that was from raking his leaves ? i looked at his face and i thought to myself okay okay calm down he is just a gentle guy who doesn't realize the alpha inside of me.. whew next thing you know i am telling him that his flamingo yard fixture is stupid and none of the neighbors dig it..which isn't true cause i don't know any of the neighbors but him and it is like i can't stop pushing buttons and then once i notice he is actually listening to me calm and collected i am back from crazybitch island and he tells me he is going to feed me and maybe i will stop being soo grouchy and you know what we actually went out to dinner and had a blast. that is until he made me buy my own coffee
so my final thoughts on this day are...things that tend to annoy me are when you are trying to have a nuclear meltdown or conniption fit and people keep barging in trying to interrupt you with their bullshit..like do you have any extra towels or come check out all glitter the ballet dancers left all over the floor in room 314. what did you say john i ask...glitter? I LOVE GLITTER- it is magic fairy dust!! after all is said and done and i am finally alone by myself again i can't find that place i was before and i was soo looking forward to it. i guess i will just have to get the calendar out and manually figure out the best time to have my mid-life crisis and mark it in big red sharpie permanent market so that everyone will know that i have plans that day. for myself..i mean what the fuk?