opposite day...

sit down and pull up a chair and let me tell you about my day cause i know your mind will need a rest. maybe i should have started with the game instead of the harrowing mind boggling shifts in mental intelligence i had to put myself thru ..and now that i am there and have fully participated in opposite day it is like my brain is not willing to break away from playing this childish turn of events that has taught me how to adapt to anything in my path for survival and respect from my 12 year old daughter hehee. yeah i said 12 year old daughter. anyway she knows more about my competitive spirit and how to work it to her advantage than say her father, my ex. and as his favorite ex-wife i think he enjoys knowing that only she can torment me into my own brand of crazy and get away with it. one of the first of my daily irritations from my youngest creampuff delight came early as we were fixing to go shopping and i had been warning her to get off moviestar planet .com and get her shoes on before it was time to go. each time a little more direct and less friendly and i knew it was time to over react in my mommy dearest way when she started getting huffy and loud...i know I KNOW and rolling her eyes. i thought that is it and i stormed her ready to grab this laptop which is my mother's and throw it out the closed window and make her clean up the broken glass. does anybody ever get that way with their kids not getting off the computer i mean geez. so i walk up behind her saying you better have your shoes on or you are not going and i am going to ..she cuts me off with i forgot dad. "i forgot dad" is she frigging crazy !!but it stops me dead in my tracks and she sticks her shoe covered feet out and says they're invisible with a smirk on her face. right then it hits me cause i forgot i promised her 5 years ago we could play opposite day if she would quit crying when she had crashed on her bike. now she wants to play..how many times do i have to start this day over..reboot my motherboard. but once it started it actually was kinda fun it was more than kinda fun it was a blast and since it is still officially opposite day here is my last normal thought.. i am so wide awake that i can't stand up..i am done clock out kris you are done!
and the official last translation is i am soo tired i wanna lay down

everett washington

deception bay

the perfect bookmark..

my mind and my body are two different lifeforms and if i didn't know any better i would say that they don't always go hand in hand together happy joy joy :) in fact if life wasn't in my face constantly i would say they don't play well together at least when it counts. my walk home from work is starting to be something that feels like all mine. since i am older now with grey hair and grown children and even a grandchild i guess it would be safe to assume that i got everything i asked for from the big guy right ? uhh okay maybe my charm sounds better when i have both my hands seductively placed on my hips and a smile lighting up my face instead of being serious and truthful all the time. i mean why try to explain something for real and take the time away from staring at yourself in the mirror or putting on make up ? lalala no really. anyway god i am soo easily perfectly suggestively tantilizingly OLD, ANCIENT, OVER THE HILL, AND SOO READY FOR BED. so much of life is stored inside our head it is like something will trigger this emotion or memory and so on and so on if you just let your mind wander. i have to keep my mind on a leash. anyway i have found the perfect bookmark for this book called life. ready for my brilliance ! yes.. the chanting give us your wisdom. wait what ...oh yeah :) our children make the perfect bookmark. i am not 100% sure what year i lived in kansas city missouri But i do know my kids were in 2nd and 3rd grade. don't know how old i was when i started working for the postal service but was right after cassidy was born because i had to stop breastfeeding once i was hired ..so 2000 i started going postal ..wow kris you are like so deserving of a song on you tube. gosh just put on marshal tucker can't you see ..can't you see what that woman has been doing to me

in cognito..

just because i am alive does not mean you can continue to waste my time by changing your game to include me in this delusional fantasy you seem to have..i actually am smarter than your everyday thumbtack and just as sharp. no actually means...not gonna happen, not gonna make it, have plans, too busy, gotta work, don't feel that way about you, not a chance, dream on loser, don't waste my time, you are frigging kidding me right CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW how bout suck my dick?

dooney & bourke..

wow ebay takes off and then slams to a halt and takes off..but keeps me busy. have probably close to 130 auctions listed at this time and this one has the most watchers and views so i thought mmhhh ...

this is a new with tags dooney & bourke north/south triple zip cross body bag, with adjustable strap. there are two outside zip pockets and one on top and all of them have black leather zipper pulls. the shoulder strap is also black leather and adjusts upto 24 inches. (but measures approx 48 inches total from one end to the other. the colors are bright and bold.perfect for places you don't need a large bag or how about your daughter's first dooney & bourke ? i do offer free shipping and thanks for looking

artificial intelligence..

what if we are the ones creating the universal mind without even realizing it ? when we need to know something we GOOGLE IT right? and as long as there is a power source we are answered in soo many ways that it is only a matter of time before create the motherboard of artificial intelligence

make-believe imagination...

i already know my make-believe imagination is out of focus and i have to ask..aren't we all? i like being out of focus because it gives me hope that i may shape up into some hot sexy goddess hottie alpha bitch..the closer i focus that is. anyway today was the second day in a row that i was called in to work on my day off, my official work week starts tomorrow but all is well. even though it was in the high thirties this morning you couldn't tell once you were inside our building looking out the window.. Or staring out the window like i like to do way up on the third floor. top of the world from where i stand hehe! Distractions get me everytime where was i ...yes the sunshine was bright and looked warm from my side of the window but my nipples showed me the true temp. i started thinking there is something in room 216 ..yesterday when i walked in and had stripped the first bed and turned toward the second one and bunched up the comforter and started to move it there was this pocket of air or something that was holding a woman's soft laugh . i swear i heard it come from the bed and it was happy and pleasing to my ears. i also decided that i need structure i cannot just write and blog about nothing everyday and get away with it . i mean with my high school education it is a damn shame to let my imagination hide behind my leg..like a child. so i thought maybe i should debate with who else but me ? i know i know brilliance is my middle name folks !
but by my third room that whole concept was slaughtered by my vivid imagination (split personality #342) if I have a choice it has got to be metaphoric or something strange like that ...how about my own brand of crazy ?!! So i wrote down a few subtitles that i would like to commit myself to in the future...you know like writing exercises. fuck it okay more like talking to myself- that is it I WIN. Anyway here's what popped up ....WAIT WAIT BREAK TIME FOR A SECOND JUST HAD A THOUGHT


okay back to my list of subtitles for my writing exercises..sound of laughter, a smack in the face, the price of freedom, over my dead body, cause i said so, my own brand of crazy, by reason of insanity, i'm a little bit country, bell-ringer, faster than a speeding bullet, nine lives, burn it down, all you have to do is ask, try harder, grace, not myself, perfectly normal, it's not like it matter's, tattle tale, bite down on this, song in my heart, elbow grease, cloudy with a chance of tears, easy on the eyes, hard to understand, playing games, time-out, and the power of pussy................which reminds me
MY FIRST WRITING EXERCISE
SO I AM SITTING IN THE BEDROOM OF MY BOYFRIENDS HOUSE AND ALL THE GUYS ARE HANGING OUT SMOKING CIGARETTES AND GOSSIPING AMONGST THEIRSELVES AND I AM DRAWN DOWN THE HALL CLOSER AND CLOSER TO HEAR WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT BECAUSE I CAN FEEL THE POWER OF ANGST OR SOMETHING IN THE AIR AND I NEED TO KNOW WHY ? AND THESE ARE ALPHA MALES AND THEY ARE NOT REALLY STUNNED TOO BAD WHEN I OPEN THE DOOR AND GRAB A SMOKE FROM THE PACK BEFORE I TURN TO MY MAN FOR A LIGHT. I SAY WHAT'S GOING ON AND ALL I HEAR IS SILENCE AND I THINK TO MYSELF WELL THIS IS SOMETHING BUT MY MAN SAYS YEAH WE CANNOT FIGURE OUT WHY SO AND SO IS CRAZY FOR THIS CHICK IT'S LIKE SHE DOESN'T HAVE A JOB AND SHE HAS 4 KIDS AND IT'S LIKE ALL OF A SUDDEN HE DOESN'T WANNA HANG OUT OR SOMETHING AND BABY THIS CHIC IS A SKANK AND THEY ALL START NODDING THEIR HEADS LIKE BOBBLEHEAD IDIOTS AND I JUST SIGH AND STAND UP AND SHAKE MY HEAD AND AS I AM GOING OUT THE DOOR I SAY IN MY ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEACHER VOICE ..SOUNDS LIKE THE POWER OF PUSSY TO ME